I remember an episode of Friends where Phoebe was trying to do a completely selfless act. Joey had told her that there was really no such thing as good deeds that weren’t selfish, because if you felt good about doing the deed afterward, that made it selfish. She found it wasn’t an easy thing to do, there was always some type of “reward” for the act. The closest she got was allowing a bee to sting her to look “tough” good in front of his bee friends. She obviously didn’t enjoy getting stung. Later Joey burst her bubble when he told her that the bee probably died after stinging her.

So, how does one be selfless? I think selflessness doesn’t get lost because of the joy or even the praise you might receive for doing the act. I think it lies in the intent or expectations you had when doing the deed. If you did the deed just to get the acknowledgement for doing it (as the Pharisees did) then it’s not selfless. But there is nothing wrong with enjoying praise for doing something good, as long as the praise wasn’t your only reason for doing it.

I think the characters in The Wizard of Oz are good examples of selflessness. While they all had reasons to get to the Wizard themselves, many times they chose to help Dorothy at their own peril, whether they got what they wanted from the Wizard or not. They chose to be “good deed doers” even if they didn’t get their testimonial.

Simply stated, selflessness is giving of ones self with no expectations.

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Phil 2:3-4